It’s Complicated!


Ever since I first went there in 1968 it’s been a ‘tradition’, (cue: Tevye + violinist), whenever I visit my cousins in Los Angeles to go and have a breakfast at Denny’s.

This time was no exception. And, as per usual, it was as much a quintessential Californian experience as it was a meal. After the usual meeting, greeting and table-ushering ceremonies were completed, we settle into our booth to study the menu and to order exactly what we knew we would order in the first place:

Hi, I’m Vince and I’ll be serving you today. Are you ready to place your order?

 Yes, I’ll have the Lumberjack Slam please.

 Which juice will you have? We have orange, apple or mixed berry.

 Mixed berry, please.

 Will that be with pancakes or French toast?

 French toast, please.

 And how would you like your eggs?

 Fried, please

Over-easy or sunny-side up?

 Sunny-side up, please.

Soft, medium or hard?

Medium, please. 

Bacon and sausages?

 Yes, please.

 How do you like your bacon?



 Yes, that would be nice.

 Which syrup would you like, berry or maple?

 Maple please.

 And toast?

 Yes, please.

 Brown, white, rye or wheat?

 Brown wheat, please?

 Any butter or spread?

 Butter, please.

 Any jam, marmalade or honey?

 Some marmalade would be nice.


 Yes please.

 With milk or cream.

 Milk, please.

 Sugar or Sweetener.


 That’s a Lumberjack Slam with French toast and maple syrup; eggs sunny side-up with crispy bacon and sausages; brown rye toast with butter and marmalade. And a mixed berry juice. I’ll be right back with your coffee.

 Wonderful, thanks. (Exhausted).


I’ve never dared to have a lunch at Denny’s ……..


This entry was posted in Humour, International, Travel and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to It’s Complicated!

  1. joelkauf says:

    The question now is was it worth it? I can understand the history and the tradition taking you back – but does the offering itself do it for you? And while I’m at it, although completely as an aside – 4 years ago exactly we were together watching the Rugby World Cup and the Final; do you remember? This time I assume you will already have lost interest, after the serious demise of your your Landsmans, by the Colonised. It only gets more interesting from here on in … enjoy the rest of your time in LA.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.